15 Signs You’re Being Taken for Granted by Someone You Love

Love, when mutual and respectful, should uplift and empower both people involved. However, sometimes the people we love most can unintentionally or carelessly take us for granted. This dynamic can leave us feeling undervalued, invisible, and emotionally drained. It’s not always obvious when it’s happening, especially if you’re the type who gives wholeheartedly. But recognizing the signs is essential for protecting your self-worth and creating healthy boundaries. Here are 15 signs you’re being taken for granted by someone you love.

1. They Assume You’ll Always Be There

One of the clearest signs you’re being taken for granted is when your presence is expected, not appreciated. They stop checking in, stop saying thank you, and stop expressing that they value your time. You’re no longer a priority—you’re just always expected to show up.

2. They Rarely Acknowledge Your Efforts

You go out of your way to do thoughtful things—whether it’s cooking dinner, planning dates, or offering emotional support. But instead of gratitude, you receive indifference. When your efforts become routine and unnoticed, it’s a red flag.

3. They Prioritize Others Over You

They cancel plans with you for friends, coworkers, or even strangers, but never the other way around. This constant deprioritization can leave you feeling secondary in their life, even when you treat them like a top priority in yours.

4. They Only Reach Out When They Need Something

You notice a pattern: they’re extra communicative when they need a favor or emotional support but are absent when you need the same. If your relationship feels transactional or one-sided, it’s a sign you’re being used more than loved.

5. They Expect You to Always Forgive

Everyone makes mistakes, but if you’re constantly expected to forgive without real change or apology, your patience is being exploited. Consistent forgiveness without accountability teaches them they can mistreat you without consequences.

6. They Don’t Reciprocate Your Support

You’re there during their hard times—listening, comforting, offering help. But when you’re struggling, they either vanish or offer surface-level concern. True love shows up both ways.

7. They Take Credit or Dismiss Your Ideas

In conversations or decision-making, they often overlook your contributions. Worse, they may take credit for your suggestions or minimize your input. Over time, this erodes your sense of importance in the relationship.

8. They Rarely Make an Effort to Surprise or Please You

Thoughtfulness is a two-way street. If you’re the only one planning celebrations, giving spontaneous gifts, or trying to keep things exciting, it may indicate they’re coasting while you do all the emotional labor.

9. They Speak to You With Disrespect

Subtle digs, sarcasm, or dismissive tones can accumulate and chip away at your self-esteem. If they consistently make you feel “less than” in conversations, your value is being overlooked.

10. They Don’t Ask About Your Day or Feelings

Daily check-ins, even short ones, show that someone cares about your emotional world. If they rarely ask how you’re feeling or what’s going on in your life, it shows a lack of emotional investment.

11. They Take Your Flexibility for Granted

You’re the one adjusting your schedule, compromising your preferences, and going along with their plans. While flexibility is important, it shouldn’t be one-sided. Mutual compromise is key in any healthy relationship.

12. They Avoid Conversations About the Relationship

Whenever you try to address how you’re feeling or bring up concerns, they shut down, change the subject, or accuse you of overreacting. This emotional avoidance dismisses your needs and keeps the imbalance in place.

13. They Show More Appreciation to Others

You see them go above and beyond for others—showing gratitude to coworkers, friends, or even strangers—but rarely to you. If you’re not receiving the same appreciation, it can feel like your efforts are invisible.

14. They Assume You’ll Handle Everything

From planning vacations to managing the household, you carry the bulk of the mental and physical load. If they don’t acknowledge or share these responsibilities, it means they expect your effort without giving it back.

15. You Feel Emotionally Exhausted Around Them

This may be the most telling sign. Instead of feeling uplifted, you feel emotionally drained after spending time together. Your energy is depleted because you’re giving so much without being emotionally refilled.

Why It Happens

People often take others for granted not out of malice, but habit. The more consistent, giving, and forgiving you are, the easier it becomes for someone to overlook your efforts. Familiarity breeds complacency, and unfortunately, we tend to undervalue what’s always available.

However, this doesn’t excuse the behavior. Recognizing these patterns is the first step toward either improving the relationship or making peace with the decision to walk away.

What You Can Do About It

1. Communicate Clearly

Sometimes people genuinely don’t realize they’re taking you for granted. Initiate a heartfelt conversation about how you’re feeling. Use specific examples, but focus on how their actions impact you emotionally.

2. Set Boundaries

Learn to say no. Refuse to overextend yourself for someone who isn’t reciprocating. Boundaries aren’t barriers—they’re bridges to healthier interactions.

3. Pull Back Intentionally

Stop over-giving. Let them notice your absence and your effort. Sometimes distance creates perspective, and people only realize your value when it’s not constantly available.

4. Focus on Yourself

Reinvest in your passions, friendships, and goals. The more you build your sense of self-worth, the less validation you’ll seek from someone who doesn’t see it.

5. Evaluate the Relationship

If nothing changes despite your best efforts, ask yourself whether this relationship aligns with the love and respect you deserve. Sometimes, walking away is the most powerful act of self-love.

Conclusion

Being taken for granted by someone you love can quietly erode your happiness, self-esteem, and emotional well-being. But you have more power than you think. By recognizing the signs, asserting your worth, and making mindful choices, you can reclaim your voice in the relationship.

You deserve to be seen, valued, and loved not just for what you give, but for who you are. Don’t settle for being someone’s emotional safety net. Be with someone who shows up, puts in effort, and makes sure you know that you matter—every single day.